Weekly Special is Back!: This is me loving you
October 15, 2010 § 4 Comments
We were coloring.
I bring crayons.
Markers are demanded.
Again, they are demanded. Not crayons! Not crayons!
I figure I should just put the whole thing away and bilingual baby can get upset and cry and I’ll fell like I’ve won. I’ve made it clear that I’m the parent and she cannot demand things from me, because clearly in the adult world, adults don’t make any kind of demands. (Read with sarcasm.)
O SON OF MAN! Humble thyself before Me, that I may graciously visit thee.
That’s where my irritation stops. I swallowed my “I’m the parent. You don’t tell ME what to do” and go downstairs to get the markers.
I figure that if bilingual baby were someone else, not family, not a kid, not I don’t know what, I’d probably grant her request without thinking twice. When you really love someone, you do all sorts of things for them, and you ask nothing in return. Why not do the same with my kids? The fact that she sounds a certain way when she declares she needs markers instead of crayons rubs me the wrong way every time. Would I be rude to a friend who made the same request? In that same tone of voice? I might just figure they were having a bad day and move on. I’d offer all the crayons, markers, and colored pencils I had.
The lesson was for me, again.
I was there to learn humility. Bilingual baby might take something from this incident. Maybe she’ll take nothing “home”. She seems to already get that being nice to people feels good on both ends, so perhaps its working.
Note: Giving myself these lessons and personal character notes in the moment drains me almost completely. Like when Jean Grey uses Cerebro in the first XM movie and needs help standing back up. That’s how much it takes from me. Luckily, I don’t have these intense interactions every single day, and I also don’t take the time at every single event to find out what is at the heart of my annoyance. When I do take the time, it’s incredibly rewarding.
I tell ya one thing. Having a nearly 4 year old is very different from anything prior. If your kid is younger, hang in there.