Here comes another hiatus

Well, I got mastitis again and this time my midwife wants me to get blood work done- just to start. She wonders about my iron levels since I’ve been feeling so worn down.

I’ve also been put on a “no more meetings” and “no commitments” diet until I’m way better. I’m sure there are a couple of moms who can fill in for me here and there. This also means no more exchanging on the time bank. I’m actually returning a project that I was never able to start.

I’ll be seeing a naturopath soon to help me balance out, so yay for that. I’m also going to see my midwife when she gets back from Bali. Sadly, this blog will probably not get my attention since it’s an extra that draws me outside of myself, as my midwife put it.

My kids are adorable and in my mind absolutely perfect and worth all the work it’s going to take to get strong. Here’s to a lot of effort!

a little more about the boy: 4.5 months

It’s been pretty cold around here lately but I haven’t been out much so I haven’t noticed much. Our snow mound is growing, as is my desire to get going on the igloo. So, that’s the next project. Should be fun.

Our little boy is gearing up for some unassisted sitting. It’s pretty cool. It proably won’t happen for a bit still but he sure is working hard to get there. He’s spending a little bit of time in the baby gym but still doesn’t want to stay there for very long. No teeth yet. It sure seems like he shoulda gotten some by now- he’s been complaining a lot.

I’ve been trying to take pictures of the gorgeous smile our little boy has but he gets so interested in the camera that he comes out like a very serious guy. He’s starting to babble a bit and coo. It is his way of talking for now. Very cute. Most of the time he still spends it watching and studying his big sister.

He loves the book Kitten’s First Full Moon. It’s a good book to read to the kids at the same time. Everyone gets something out of it. Ok. Gotta feed.

getting better all the time

Before we headed to bed last night I assured myself that there was no way that the night could be any harder than the night before. I figured as much because that’s what usually happens to me. I have a really tricky day and feel like there could be no harder day for me in sight. The next day (or night) is markedly easier. I also figured things couldn’t get any harder because I believe that we aren’t tested beyond our capacity. So, I got mastitits, got very little sleep, and tried to help teething babies through their discomfort.

Last night we got a good chunk of sleep. I put lavender oil on our pillow and nursed bilingual baby a little and then we just talked until she fell asleep. She woke up maybe twice but the intensity of her cries wasn’t nearly what we had seen the night before. I took Elm (Bach Flowers) before going to bed and then Gentian in the middle of some of bb’s crying so I would be able to stay in the moment.

Miso soup, avocado, rice and tea for breakfast. Feeling better every day.

responding

I have such a low tolerance for babies crying. I don’t mean that if I were on a bus I’d be the lady rolling her eyes at the sound of a baby’s whimper. I mean that I have a hard time listening to my kids crying and not responding. This is a gift and a curse. It’s probably why I do EC with them and try to respond to their needs in the AP way. When they do cry and I’ve tried a bathroom break, nursing and have adjusted layers of clothing, I can then go to tactic #2. That would include teething, something that’s pinching or poking them, emotional state, and developmental milestone. If they’re still crying after those two tactics, and (this is what happens with bilingual baby these days) no consoling in the world will bring on an effect, I turn to Rescue Remedy or Vetiver to keep me calm while I try to observe their behavior to see if I should intervene.

Tricky part is when mama is too tired for any of this. You’d think I had either a ton of patience or a ton of rough days. Well, neither. I’ve got average patience and have had some rough days but not enough to say my life is all doom and gloom. I mean, today was going to be labeled “the worst day after the worst night EVER” and I still managed to have enough in me to make bilingual baby a little house made out of cardboard boxes. She wants me to install a door now.

How in the world does it work out? who knows. Who started this conversation anyway?

I like typing out thoughts when I feel like a zombie. It’s like writing when you’re on an airplane or on a train. There’s something about travel writing that I love so much.

4 o’clock. Tea time.

Here come the ABCs

I will only say quickly that we had a horrible night last night. I did bedtime. Bilingual baby woke up at least 7 times and wanted to nurse every time. It reminded me of when she was a month old… which feels like an eternity ago. She … anywho. I said I’d be quick about it.

We’re watching the dvd that They Might Be Giants put together called Here come the ABC’s (it is by Disney Sound so I have a it of issue with that). She is currently fascinated by the abc’s and we’re trying to follow her interests. She likes saying, “double u”, for instance. The music is enjoyable and goofy. (She’s wanting to repeat the D & W song over and over. Go toddler mind. Now she’s onto playing with the box that came with some of her Christmas presents that wouldn’t fit in our bags on the way back home. Always keep the box!

As she’s been watching that thing, I’ve been looking more into the Bach Flower Remedies. There are 7 Bach Flower groups so that you can better figure out which remedy will benefit your current mood.

I know I should be resting

but, after resting for the last couple of days and moving so slowly, I’ve noticed more and more dirt around the house. We don’t live in a big place so when it’s dirty it surrounds me. I have been resting this week because I got mastitis again. Yes. Again. My luck. Bilingual papi came up with the cause. Before going to Chicago for Christmas, he was doing bedtime with our toddler which meant that she wasn’t nursing a ton before falling asleep. She would nurse a bit before going upstairs but not much. When we were in Chicago, I did bedtime, so she was falling asleep nursing (and increasing my milk supply). When we got back home, papi went back to doing bedtime, I (with lower demand) got mastitis.

Anywho, I went into mastitis mode with the vitamin C/heat/cabbage leaves, etc, etc, and also got a friend bring by some herbs to help me heal. We actually have an herb store downtown. I really need to get over there and check it out. I mean, come on. We’ve got a co-op and an herb store. I think it’s cool.

The kids are both still teething. No sign of a tooth for baby brother yet.

Ooh. Plow guy is here. Glad I didn’t have to brave the snow to get to work. Bilingual is now asking me, “Is it done?” She doesn’t like watching the plow guy do his work anymore. She did for a couple of runs. She even sang a plow guy song. Today she had be hold her the whole time. Then, I just closed the blinds so that I could make lunch for us. After a couple of minutes I wanted to see if the plow guy was done so I lifted the blinds. She said, “turn it off”. So there you go.

Still in the fog

Been enjoying Mothering mag this issue as well as Brain, Child. I have been thinking a lot about body issues and especially post-partum body issues. Seems to be that I inherited some that I didn’t have after having bilingual baby. Maybe it was because we didn’t have a mirror that spoke up for what I think society has to say to me.

Little by little, and as baby brother gets bigger, I’m finding more time to get my craft on. He is teething big time- as is his big sister- so, yes, I have my hands full. Just last night I was saying how fun it is to have these two… and then bilingual papi goes back to work and teeth poke through.